You’re probably wondering just where this blog post is going, based on the title. And it could obviously go in many directions. I only need to preface this by saying that I’m sharing this true story to give you a chuckle. I’ll assume you have enough sense to wear underwear to your own wedding.
As a wedding officiant I get to see a lot of things that go right, an occasional thing that goes wrong and once in a while an inside bit of humor. Where appropriate I’ve mastered the art of smiling on the inside and being discreet. This story is one of the latter!
It was a Scottish-influenced wedding. The ceremony included a bagpipe processional, a hand fasting ceremony and in the case of the groom, authentic dress. His father was proud of the heritage and joined in by wearing a kilt as well.
During a reading in this Denver wedding ceremony in an outdoor venue, I had a moment to let my eyes wander among the guests, something I enjoy doing to get a sense of their level of enthusiasm for the unique wedding ceremonies I put together. On this particular occasion my eyes ended on the front row where the parents were appropriately enraptured and still clearing up their tears from the Parent Recognition words.
And then my eyes landed. They did not linger. Out of shock I knew I had to re-focus immediately on the ceremony or else I would lose my train of thought. But what I saw had me pretty shocked, as well as concerned. The groom’s father, attired in his kilt, had spread his legs apart at which point it became apparent to me he was not wearing underwear. Things were pretty much hanging out in the gentle afternoon breezes.
At this point in the ceremony the bride and groom had turned to face one another, but I knew shortly they would be turning outward to face their guests. I pondered whether there was any action I could take to get the dad to sit, ah, a little more formally, prior to his brand new daughter-in-law turning to face him.
I never looked back to know. Some things, like a potentially blushing bride, are better left to the imagination. Or not.