Embracing Ceremony Blog

Here it is the eve of Valentine’s Day and as a wedding celebrant it would seem appropriate that I might expound on romance, love and the like! What originally drew me to be a wedding officiant was the opportunity to work with people in love. It really doesn’t get better than that!

Part of the blessing of my work comes in the planning process when I’m interviewing couples and learning their story. I hear many fun tales of how they met, first dates and engagements. My favorite stories of this ilk involve coincidence – or is it fate? – when random events or circumstance bring two people together. One that comes to mind is a young man that had a very strict swimming routine and schedule in his huge apartment complex. One day, the pool was unexpectedly closed at his accustomed time. He went to a different pool in the complex and ended up spending hours in conversation with a woman who happened to be there. That was the start of their courtship.

The real joy for me is officiating the wedding ceremony itself. This is where the love really shines through. When the groom first sees the bride (or the other groom!) appear, it is not uncommon to see a tear roll down his cheek. That’s a sure sign to me of the trueness of the love. And when the couple stands before me, especially as they first look into each other’s eyes, I can see the depth of understanding and love in their exchange. More tears are possible. And the pinnacle of emotions is the vow exchange – what I call the “heart” of the ceremony. As the marriage celebrant, I say the vow and the couple repeats after me. The personalization of these vows means they are speaking very heartfelt, true words and promises to each other and not just the generic “till death do us part.” I am heartened and feel great optimism for the marriage’s success when the couple has trouble choking out the words. I’m always happy to go as slowly as necessary and to beam supportively to help the couple through this very personal moment, the exchange of vows.

Valentine’s Day is a popular time for an engagement and I always look for an increase in inquiries following it. Just as I’ll look for that intense look of love when I meet the couple!